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13th-Feb-2006 01:57 am

So right now I am living with...well I kind of want to say "best friend", but I don't like the term much. But ya we're pretty much as close as I have ever gotten to any friend, I love this guy to pieces. He tells me just about everything that goes on in his life, and is really open about it all. The thing though, is that I have a bit of trouble doing the same thing back. It's not that I don't trust him, because I do. I guess that I'm just a more private person? I mean, I've always been like that. I love people, but I need breaks from them as well. Like...at parties and stuff like that...I usually slip away into some empty room for a couple of minutes here and there, just to have that quiet for a couple of minutes. It's not because I don't like the people, it's just because I need the quiet too. Ya know? And even though I trust him, I get really jumpy about him reading my IM convos and emails and phone messages and the like. It's something I'm used to be in total control of, and the thought of him having access sortof freaks me out. Maybe I'm just embarrased? Not sure over why though, so it's not very likely.

What do you all think? I guess my plan as of now is to try and more activelly fill him in on stuff, even if it's small and insignificant. The thought of him reading here and there as he wants to still makes me very uneasy, but at least I can try to include him more so he doesn't feel left out. Maybe I just need practice :P

13th-Feb-2006 05:08 am (UTC)
I live right next door to my faghag, and although we talk basically about every single thing that goes on in our lives - sex, relationships, school, etc, we certainly do not have access to each other's e-mails, phone messages or anything of that nature. I don't believe we would be comfortable invading the other's privacy either.

Needing space is one thing. Even I and my faghag that many perceive as husband and wife do need that, but there’s a huge arse line separating that and an invasion of privacy.
13th-Feb-2006 07:59 am (UTC) - The Limits of Openness
I think what you describe is very natural. Some people share more completely and openly than others. Most people never share every little thing with another person. But some do. Some like that their life is a completely open book for everyone to see. And that is cool. But don't feel obligated to be a person you are not. We all have layers and choose to share what we want to share and not want to share. I know personally for a true and complete picture of me, you'd have to put several friends in a room and they would have to compare notes.

But I agree with the above. Phone messages, e-mails, even what I am typing on the screen is somewhat more private than other things. When I catch people doing that, I usually make a point to ask for some privacy while I continue what I am doing and promise to focus on them in a few minutes.

I totally don't think I added anything of value here *lol* blame it on the cold medicine :-)